Day 1: Admitting I have a problem

I’m going to skip the traditional introductions here and just jump right in. If you’re interested in learning a bit about me, I suggest the aptly titled “A little about me” tab at the top of this page.  (:

It seems to me my weight fluctuates in extremes. At my lowest adult weight, I was around 162. At my highest, 235. I’m 5′6 and have been since I was 18. According to that wonderful BMI chart, I have never been a healthy weight. And while I make no habits of doubting the great minds that designed it, I’m not sure I believe I should ever weigh only 114 pounds. But as I type this, I wonder if that’s not just another excuse.

My ultimate goal is to weigh around 150 pounds. I haven’t weighed myself in several weeks, so I’m not sure exactly how much I have to lose. But I do know it’s quite a bit and will take me a while. Starting tomorrow, or in a few days, I will begin weighing myself weekly. I just have to set a day of the week and time of day I can commit to.

I love lists, and feel most productive when I’m making them and adhering to them. This is a collection of reasons why I want to lose weight (including, but not limited to… I’m sure I’ll leave something out).

- I would like to avoid all the nasty diseases I will inevitably inherit if I remain unhealthy and overweight. These include diabetes, high blood pressure, and cancer. Cancer may not be directly linked to obesity, but it runs rampant in my family, and the healthier I am, the better chances I feel I’ll have to avoid it.

- I want more energy. It really pains me to admit I’m 22 years old and I feel like an 80 year old woman sometimes.

- I want to see if losing weight has any effect on my asthma. At 19 I was diagnosed with adult-onset asthma. A complete shock to me. I would love to minimize my symptoms, if at all possible.

- I want to improve my upper gi health. I’ve been on acid reflux medication for several years and the only times I remember not needing it is when I weighed less.

- I want to be lean, fit, and flexible. I want to appear strong, not marshmallowy.

Now for the less noble, but equally important reasons…

- I have noticed I have two “go-to” pairs of jeans. There’s no two ways about it… they are my fat jeans. I want to be able to comfortably and confidently wear ALL the jeans in my closet, even the tight ones.

- I want to shop where ever I want. I don’t care if it sounds shallow, I want to shop at the stores that stop at size 12. And I want to choose clothes based on how they look, not always how they look/fit.

- I want the first thing I assume people notice to not be my weight. I don’t want to be described as “the bigger one” anymore.

- I don’t want to avoid having my picture taken anymore

- To be able to wear shorts confidently

- To be able to wear a swim suit confidently

- To be able to feel comfortable, instead of bloated and big all the time

- To feel sexy taking a bath or sitting in a hot tub.

- So I can finally get a short haircut and not worry whether my head will look like a giant melon.

- To be able to sit with my legs crossed for long periods of time

- To be able to walk in heels for long periods of time

- So people believe I am the intelligent, capable person I know I am, and not someone who is fat and unhealthy and unable to take care of herself.

- To simply feel good about myself.

- And finally, to be able to tell people I was there once, and that they can lose the weight too. I want to be an inspiration to others.

Alright! I feel like I’ve written a book.

I’m not sure I like this layout, yet. The colors are kinda meh and I’m having issues with formatting.

I feel like this was a successful first post. My subsequent posts will be able food, weighing myself, fitness techniques I’m utilizing. This will be a place for accountability. And a place for new ideas to jump start my weight loss. I’ll see you all again very soon! Good luck, everyone.

Here's to hard work and determination,

-E