Day 147 - So Disappointed

Last night as I laid down to sleep, I think I knew deep down today wasn't going to be a good weigh day. And I hoped, and hoped when I stepped on the scale, since I knew it wasn't going to be a loss, that I'd see a maintain. But, today goes to show me exactly what happens when I let "Not worrying so much" transform into "Eat like I ate 4 months ago".

Last Week:              178.8
This Week:                  180.4

I gained 1.6 pounds! I wanna say I don't know how... but I do.

And I'm really, REALLY trying to reason with myself. An *actual* 1.6 pound gain means I ate like 5,600 calories over my maintenance calories. I don't know if that's even possible... So I am sitting here, trying to convince myself this is just a little hiccup, or maybe water weight, or maybe I did gain some but not ALL of that almost 2 pounds?

Calories, calories, calories...
Calorie Range: 1,200 - 1,350

Tues, May 22   1,415 (-142 from exercise) = 1,273 "net"
Wed, May 23   1,286
Thus, May 24   1,844 (visited my grandparents)  
Fri, May 25      1,180 
Sat, May 26      1,380
Sun, May 27     1,292
Mon, May 28    ???? (Went to a BBQ, then had Mexican, too many to even try to count)

As you can see... it's been a week since I last exercised. And I had 2 very high calorie days along with a couple that were a bit over my range. 

I need to light that fire inside me again. It's like I got to halfway and decided I could just coast the rest of the way there.

Well news flash! I can't! Time to get back with it. Starting TODAY. This week and next week: No more days were I just arbitrarily stop trying to count. No more excuses for why I can't exercise. And no more excessive late night snacking. This doesn't really show in my calorie counts for the day, but I snack entirely too much late at night, right before bed. So from now on... one small snack after dinner and before bed, and that's it. 

On a more positive note... I bought our train tickets to New Orleans a couple days ago. So our hotel is officially reserved and our tickets are purchased. I don't think I could be more excited. 14 days and counting! 

Sorry there wasn't much else in this one, to anyone who unfortunately happens across it. Hah!

Here's to hard work and determination (and actually listening to that advice),

-E